Scanner Reports 7-8-20

By Roger the Scanner Guy

This past week has been rough so I joined a church. I go 5 times a day. I decided that I’m going to start printing sermons in place of my writings with the scanner reports because some of you need JESUS really badly. JESUS is the answer to my bad thoughts. I have been seeing a therapist lately and have received a medication change, first I have to drink 10 cups of coffee then read Edhat first thing in the morning then I play basketball with my head for 45 minutes against a wall while singing Happy Birthday outside Gentleman Jim’s front door while taking a shower with his garden hose. I don’t know why but he always closes the door softly because he doesn’t want to hurt my feelings. Oh gee what a crazy week. So how are all of you doing? Don’t read the fucking news it will make you crazy, here are Your Scanner Reports.

Scanner Reports, Monday:

459pc Burglary to a vehicle. Shadow Mountain Drive.
Traffic Accident with injuries Calle Real at Patterson.
415pc Bad Transient with a security guard at Ralphs 100 West Carrillo
DUI Driver involved in a 415 Domestic 3700 Block of State street.
Med call 2000 Block of Cliff Drive
Commercial vehicle fire behind Cost Co 7000 Block of Market Place.
Rollover traffic accident 101 Northbound near Seacliff Ventura County.
415 Neighbors some are possible gang members in a red Honda Castillo at Pedregosa
Med call 130 West Victoria.
I just heard the Sheriff’s Dispatcher say he was holding a nude subject at Butterfly Beach sounds like the Sheriffs Dept. has better benefits than the City Police Dept.
Female pushing a baby stroller along the 101 Northbound Garden Offramp check the welfare for a possible baby in the stroller.
Possible Drunk Driver involved in a wreck in Carpinteria off Via Real on 101.
2225 DLV Med call.
20002pc Non injury hit and run highway 101 Northbound at Bettervia, Santa Maria.
Heat Stroke Cold Springs Trail off Mountain Ave.
Hazardous Condition First Block of East Carrillo.
Royal Subjects throwing apples at cars from the Anapamu foot bridge.
Threats investigation 132 Harbor Way.
Subject doing Drugs on the front porch of Silly Hall 735 Anacapa.
Burglary investigation 300 Block of East Cota.
Stolen vehicle Union at Quarantina.
10851 Recovery 700 Block of West Islay.

Scanner Reports, Tuesday:

Suspicious person taking pictures in a neighborhood 3700 Block of Gregory Way.
Medical call Salvation Army 423 Chapala street.
101 Southbound offramp traffic accident non injury.
Med Call on Oceanview.
20002 non injury hit and run Los Positas Place at Los Positas Road.
Overdose 300 Block of West Haley.
Structure fire response 1100 Block of Citrus Drive Ventura county.
Lazy Acres employee theft Meigs Road employee was still on scene.
Dumpster Fire next to a structure 2800 Block of South Ventura Road.
Med Call 3800 Block of State street.
On a subject at Speedy Mart 800 North Milpas.
415 Subject yelling obscenities I can relate 800 Block of Orange Avenue.
Vehicle rollover highway 101 Southbound at Alisos Canyon.
500 Block of East Esplanade overdose Ventura.
South Calle Chavez at the RR Tracks Med Call.
Vegetation Fire the 118 at Kuehner Drive Ventura.
Naked male Butterfly Beach 415pc Disagreement with a clothed male.
Med call Montecito at Bath in a homeless camp I think the guy was sleeping.

I got it GOLETA ANNE YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE. What really gets to me is people who enjoy hurting others but don’t have any scars on their body, they never had it bad but they are assholes. I have an excuse being an asshole and all and I’m a real one. Some guy called me a real asshole the other day that is how I know. I have to take my medication now. Have a nice HUMP day…Peter, Molly, Belinda, Midnight, Merlin, Angel Baby, Pooh Bear, Lola, PoPo, Shadow, FREDDIE, Maxwell, Liza, Zoey, Tom Cat, Tiger, Tomicina, Clancy, Tiny, Andy, FISH HEADS ONE, TWO, and THREE, Poncho, Denny, Zeke, Jerry, Walter, Fred, Jonathan, C.J., Brad, Billy, Diana, Jim, Ross, Rambo, Sherry, Carl, Stan, Kent, ELMO, Patrick, Christy, Eddie, Bambi, Mark, Willie, Lafayette, Ted, Bengie, Ricky, Mrs MacArthur, Auntie Helen, Pat, Mavis, David Cox, Po, Marty, Firefighter Robert, Cop John, Bommy, Poppy, June, Muskie, Roger, Father Zimmerman,Joseph, Magruder, Don, Edwin, Cory, Kona, Crazy Ed, Debbie, Ken, Isabelle, Jerry, LUCY!, STOBE THE HOBO, KFC, John Handcock, Mickey Mantle, Ernie Banks, Ron Santo, John Havlick, Little Mac, Lucky, John Prime, Tom Petty, Rich Mullins, Charley Bukowski Bill, John, Marianne, and Chris Willing we will see you on FLYday.. Later, Roger