Scanner Reports 5-31-17

A lot of accidents are reported as injury accidents, then the responders get there and say “no injury”. Send the R.P. to Roger; I’ll fix it. I post a Code Red or request one, I go from a confirmed injury to no injury and it has to be cancelled. It would not be right to post it. It’s a real bummer going back and forth. I only type with one finger, the only one that hasn’t been broken (my middle finger) on my right hand. After all these years, one would think that the finger would have been broken at least a dozen times, but it never has. All the others have; either the finger itself or the knuckle. Even when I’m listening to a potential Code Red and I wait till the responders get on scene, they will sometimes say it’s an injury, then a few minutes later, non-injury. If I had a vehicle, I might drive over there, get out of the car, and do a running jump into the middle of the scene yelling “I’m injured! Take me! Take me!” It drives me nuts sometimes.

Tuesday morning I hoped into the shower, nothing was going on. I came out to brushfires alongside 101 west of Goleta. It sounded as if the fires were out of control, though they were not. There I was, naked and soaking wet, the blinds were open, and I could hear a neighbor leaving her home. I had this vision in my head on KEYT: “Roger Dodger arrested for Indecent Exposure trying to bust a grape in Gallo’s backyard.” I waited till the neighbor split before posting, which was good because the fires were small. Although, all fires should be posted as Code Reds. Little fires can become big fires and if someone is lighting them, the public needs to know about it.

I met a reader of edhat in my HOOD on Tuesday, his name is Ken. I’m not good with names, so I have to write them down. Welcome to edhat, Ken.

Here is Thy Blessed Scanner Roni Reports, Monday:

Fight between two subjects, 5600 block of Hollister, one has a brick. They were both gone when the SBSO got there. I got hit in the head with a brick one time in a fight. I know you can’t tell; I’m pretty normal now.
Fight inside of McDonalds on Fairview, numerous subjects. I have no idea what they were fighting over, maybe there was a shortage of coffee. That is the only thing I think is worth fighting over.
UI big naked man in the Carrillo underpass, flashing vehicles and wasn’t happy that it was against the law to do so, became combative and had to be restrained.
Albertsons, male in and out of the women’s restroom.
Suicidal son started a fire on top of his school, La Colina Junior High, 4000 Block of La Colina.
Family domestic, 6200 block of Covington Way.
Medical call, traumatic injury on Camino Del Remedio.
Drunk in the laundrymat, 163 South Turnpike.
Assault in the 5900 block of Hollister.
Mary 3 on a traffic stop with a grey Honda in the 1500 block of DLV.
Lewd conduct on the front porch of a green house in the 600 block of Chapala.
Check the welfare of a female down, Laguna at Los Olivos.
Illegal burn, 1200 block of Punta Gorda in a back yard.
Physical fight, two males in Starbucks, State and Cota. Fist fighting, throwing chairs, choking each other. Not sure if they left before the police got there or what, but witness reports had them really going at it.
Report of a male beating up a child in a residence in the 5900 block of Hickory, then a female voice heard, “Why did you do that?”
Domestic violence, 1300 block of San Pasqual, sister’s husband pulled victims hair.
Non injury black SUV hit 3 parked cars and a motorcycle at the Old Mission, 2201 Laguna.
Rape in the County, did not hear where.
Son ripped off parents black Mercedes in Summerland, Lo Jack hits brought the criminal to the attention of SBSO, who got the car back to the victim. I don’t think any charges were filed.
Lewd conduct, male entering female restroom at the Visitors Center, One Garden Street.
Robbery 76 Station 1100 block of East Clark in Santa Maria. Suspect grabbed stack of 20’s, left out back. White or Hispanic male, acted as if he had a weapon, none seen, wearing a hoodie.

Tuesday Scanner Reports:

Medical call ill male at the West Side Clinic 600 block of West Micheltorena.
Premises check, 600 block of East Cabrillo.
2600 block of Foxen Canyon, vehicle accident.
Ex-employee refusing to leave Villa Alamar, 45 East Alamar.
Male with a rifle in the 3700 Block of Via Lotto, Lompoc turned out to be a BB gun.
Domestic in the 200 block of Pacific Oaks Road.
A female student at a school told a school principal in the county that two men blindfolded her and possibly raped her.
Attempt assault, subject in a wheelchair at the county clinic attempted to assault reporting party.
Dog fight, Miramar Beach.
RV Complaint, 800 block of West Islay.
Medical call, basement of the Balboa Building.
Brush Fires alongside 101 northbound, west of Goleta.
Death in a residence on South Canada.
Lewd conduct, white male in his 40’s wearing a red hat and green jacket, 217 East Gutierrez, Smart and Final.
Theft of a bottle of Champagne from the Wine Hound in the 3000 block of State Street, suspect BMA 6’4.
Check the welfare of a female down in the 1400 Block of Orella Del Mar on the sidewalk.
Medical call for a female who fainted in the .99 Cent Store, 424 State Street.
100 block of Carmen fall victim medical call.
Report of two females yelling and hitting each other in a black sedan in the 700 block of Olive.
I don’t know where, but I heard a train hit a vehicle somewhere. Never heard the location, even heard them talking about it on the train channel but never heard where it was.

I have been hearing a lot of ill subject medical calls. I hope it’s not that stuff I have been hearing about in the news, I don’t like getting sick. Us old, out of shape farts get sick all the time. I have to really watch it now that I’m older. Maybe I’ll just move into the closet. Anyway, have a happy Wednesday! Belinda, Angel Baby, Pooh Bear, Clancy, Poncho, Jerry, Jonathan, C.J., Carl, Stan, Walter, Fred, Brad, Billy, Elmo, Cory, Magruder, Don, Rambo, Sherry, Isabelle, Jerry, Edwin, John Hancock, Mickey Mantle, Ernie Banks, and Chris willing, we will see you on FRYday. Later, Roger